Sunday, July 01, 2007

ketchup

It's been a few days since my last post. There has been a lot going on this past week and I have needed some down time in the evenings. Last night, however, was a different story. Last night was our buddy Jack "Mahogoff" Brown's bachelor party.

The day started innocently enough. The normal Saturday group ride saw 20 people show up. 4 of the riders had never been on the ride before. Have you ever noticed how when new people show up on a ride, you try to give them a heads up as to how things are going to go? Well, here I am telling them it's an out and back ride, it will start mellow and then pick up, but the route is easy, etc... Anyway, right before we take off, Chuck announces that this is Jack's last ride since he is getting married. Not last ride as a single man, but the dreaded LAST ride - ever. Now Jack is a calm and implacable guy, but the drillfest that ensued from the opening moments of the ride belied a touched nerve. As we shot down 90 at between 28 and 30 (so I heard, I don't ride with a computer for the very reason that I don't want a number to go with the pain), Michael (our first timer) rode up beside me no less than 4 times and asked, "Is it going to stay this fast?" Since I was having to put so much effort into breathing I wasn't able to articulate, "Dear god I hope not" and managed to say, "No". Sure enough it eased up a bit after Sand Mtn. We got to the end of Anthony's Creek and Chuck felt like thanking us for the pace of the ride; his first in a month. Now, I'll have to admit that I thought Chuck was taking his jersey off to cool down, but no, when you wear bib shorts the jersey has to come off before you can drop trou' and moon everyone. Someone remarked that they could see hemorrhoids, but Chuck assured him that those were his tonsils.

Fast forward past a busy day at the shop to the start of the aforementioned bachelor party at good ol' Sledgehammer Charlie's. Knowing that you are about to throw down with the owner of the restaurant gives one a certain amount of confidence that they won't get kicked out... As per the usual, we proceeded to order for Jack every strong and disgusting drink we could come up with. The restaurant staff got in on the act and started looking up bachelor party drinks on the internet. The rest of us maintained a strong and steady pace, setting tempo to Jack's breakaway. Needless to say, there are pictures and some video. Our bachelor took it all in good stride, wearing the numerous panties that he received in good humor and later donning the most alluring pair to be captured for all of posterity. I walked home, enjoying the light of a full moon and remembering the staggering intoxication of my own high altitude bachelor party...

It looks like there will be a break this week in the saga of thunderstorms we have been having. Hopefully, this will be my window of opportunity for house painting. Wish me luck...
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