Thursday, June 28, 2012

The light of day

Released today from an anonymous source close to the inner workings of the suspected motorized doping ring involving Team Luna Cycles Directeur Sportif Richard Fish, this photo shows an unnamed German foreign exchange student carrying a large stuffed chili pepper. This chili pepper may have been the means by which several dozen genetically modified hamsters bred to power small hub mounted engines were smuggled into the United States from a pet shop in Berlin. Richard Fish could not be reached at this time.

Ironically, Directeur Sportif Quint Ervin of  Team SRAM Red 2012 p/b Bojangle's and brother to Directeur Sportif Josh Ervin of  the Track Wooly Mammoth team and the first person to break the rumor of Richard Fish's alleged motorized doping, has been implicated in a complex scheme to smuggle raw chicken from China to be prepared by the Bojangle's team chef for a "original recipe" that would mask the high amounts of banned substances that the meat is alleged to be tainted with for use by team riders later in the Tour to aid recovery and performance. No comment from Mr. Ervin at this time.

It's still not too late to join in on the Luna Cycles Big Deal Fantasy Tour de France presented by Uncle Chuck's New School Pregreaser, it's out with the old and in with the New School! Just jump over to www.velogames.com and use mini league code 24021849 to throw your team into the fantasy whirlwind that is the Luna Cycles Big Deal Fantasy Tour de France presented by Uncle Chuck's New School Pregreaser, it's like chamois cream for your bike's junk!
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