Saturday, July 05, 2008

Tour underway

Lenoir, NC (LC Press)- An unorthodox and nervous start to this year's Luna Cycles Fantasy Tour de France presented by Uncle Chuck's Depilatory Cream for Men, "For all those hard to reach hairy places!", has already seen one French rider abandon. Herve Duclos-Lasalle lost a fight with a musette in the feed zone, breaking his wrist in the process. Frenchman Jerome Pineau got lost in the bunch and discovered himself at the head of affairs, netting himself an improbable 3rd place on the stage. Otherwise, things were decidedly ordinary as no other Frenchman managed to make it into the top 40.

As for the day's stage, Team Not Caught Yet has taken the lead in the Luna Cycles Fantasy Tour de France presented by Uncle Chuck's Depilatory Cream for Men, "For all those hard to reach hairy places!", despite being beaten for the stage win by Team Birra Carolini. Surprisingly, directeurs sportif Charles Hicks and Jeff Welch sit in 2nd and 3rd overall, signaling a reversal of fortune for their teams which have, thus far this season, sucked.

In other news, the Amoury Fantasy Sports Organization announced today that 100 points would be awarded to any team whose French rider wears the maillot jaune. Further, they announced harsh fines for any team who has a rider test positive during the Fantasy Tour. If a fantasy team loses a rider due to a doping violation, the directeur sportif must pay a fine of one (1) double-iced americano with cream. Their hope is that this will make directeurs sportif "think twice" before allowing a suspicious rider on the fantasy team.

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