Wednesday, February 25, 2009

When in doubt - deny

 
In the high stakes, competitive world of school bus driving, drugs have begun to creep in following the drivers as the salaries and sponsorship deals have grown to astronomical proportions. In an effort to get in front of this lurking problem, school systems across the country have instituted drug testing programs to try and level the playing field and send a strong message that cheaters will not be tolerated in a sport with the storied purity of competition that competitive bus driving has long enjoyed.

Due to some recent stellar performances on the road side of Bus driving competition, I found myself visited by the anti-doping control squad for an unannounced out of competition test. Not to brag, but I have been finding strength in both the extended backing up competitions and in the road course/slalom competitions recently and I viewed my visit by the "vampires" (or more accurately the "urine drainers") as a sign that I have arrived!

In an effort to try and show the future generations of competitive bus drivers that performance enhancing drugs have no place in the sport, I would like to formally announce the launch of my new anti-doping organization, DriveClean. The DriveClean movement seeks to encourage all current and future competitive bus drivers to compete with their natural gifts and talents, honed by years of practice and to not try and take the easy way to victory by using PED's. Together, we can make a difference!

3 comments:

Jacob said...

You look clean.

Jacob said...

Are driving for the RockRacing branch?

Anonymous said...

As the chairmen of the UBI and the local expert on bus driving I can only say that Mr Moore's reults on the road in now way indicate the use of any "Performance Enhancement".

Eddie Winkler